You can check/service your transmission like this:

Easiest place to start otherwise would be the upper torque mount: https://www.fcpeuro.com/products/volvo-engine-torque-rod-xc90-30680708-1
and lower engine/transmission torque mount: https://www.fcpeuro.com/products/volvo-engine-torque-rod-mount-hutchinson-30793792

If you can have someone engage the transmission while inspecting these, and look for excessive movement. The lower mount bolts up underneath, where the engine mates with the transmission. The top mount is on the top rear of the engine.

 

Maybe axle ping?

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That's what I was going to say. I had the same thing with my XC70 so I re-torqued the axle bolts and it's almost been eliminated. The next step is to get a pair of the anti ping axle bolts.

 

What you are experiencing is kind of normal for your mileage, however, it is a good time to address the maintenance and that might help reduce the occurrence.

It could be the transmission fluid, transmission valve body, engine mounts, axles/CVs, axle bolt, etc. Some of the Drive-to-Reverse clunk/thump can happen at different temps too. It could be one or a combination of normal wear and maintenance.

The best thing to do now is first changing your transmission fluid. Then change the engine mounts. If you do a turn when changing from D to R, while backing up into the garage or parking space, then it could also be loose CV joints/axles. The axles might not be broken, but have normal wear. Not to worry as the driveline for the 3.2 is rated for the V8 power, thus with the lower torque, the axles can last longer.

 

I have a similar clunk with my V8 with 150,000km.
I changed fluid and no change.
I now assume that it is just the valve body doing its job changing into gear. I honestly do not remember if it was there when we bought the car as I stressed out about a leaking power steering pump at the time.

If someone has a V8 or 3.2 that does not clunk - please advise.

Given that your 3.2 is clunking same as my V8 - I'd assume its just valve body wear - if its asymptomatic, doesn't need to be replaced.

 

'09 XC90 3.2 with 97k miles (not km).
No kind of clunk at fore-aft shift. Threw a lot of parts at it to renew, rather than repair when I bought it. Axles, port aft motor mount (leaking), upper torque (actually worn), ball joints, control arm bushes, trans oil change, and poly sub-frame inserts.
Didn't actually have a clunk before, either, come to think of it.
I'm always apprehensive of the cold start high idle shift-to-gear, and try to wait until it comes down, but that seems to be "muscle memory" rather than a real concern. The smart boxes between engine and trans reduce the engine speed before trans engagement even if high idle is still on. No clunk.

 

Only had my 2003 xc90 T6 2.9l 270 km since november I think and it started pinging when I would engage the transmission 6 weeks ago. Was wondering what was that sound. Hopefully just something to grease or small bolts to change...
If it's a rubber mount, depending on where it is, hope not to bad...

 

I will tell you how I solved this clunk on engagement or sometimes when I slow down and use manual mode from higher gears to 2' clonk was present.
Simply I changed front joint and no more clunk. Before I changed also all engine supports, bevel gear, sleeve, torque limiter, top mount but all this
didnt solved my clunk on engagement or reverse or slow motion move than clunk. Joint in front on main axle going to rear solved. Happy. See photos.
Cheap and quick as all joint inside was worn and have lot of space to produce CLONK.

 

I am checking right now and looking for this part. Can you give me the part number just in case.
Would this be the part
on rock auto

ULTRA-POWER 932501 {#30735027} Info
AT DRIVESHAFT; FRONT; 4WD/AWD

or this
https://www.amazon.ca/Dorman-932-50...Joint/dp/B00FY81L0G/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=31216175&qid=1591554151&sr=8-1

On fcp Euro I find this
Volvo Drive Shaft CV Joint Kit - Genuine Volvo 31216175
https://www.fcpeuro.com/products/volvo-cv-joint-kit-xc70-xc90-v70-v50-s40-s60-31216175

one part is 200 to 300 the other around 30 to 60 ??

What do you have to remove to fix this front axle joint or the whole axle ??
thanks

 

I recommend this company for the propshaft CV or entire propshaft https://coloradodriveshaft.com/products.htm
They've been around a while and are used by a lot of members here; including myself. Good quality products.
Ebay store: https://www.ebay.com/usr/coloradodriveshaft?_trksid=p2047675.l2559

https://www.volvoxc.com/forums/showthread.php?22213-Propeller-shaft-front-CV-joint-repair

 

thanks
I did have the proper item.
Weird that this item ranges from 45 to $360 on fcp euro

 

Hmmmmm... guess I missed where the OP said he has AWD?

 

Yes have a 2003 xc90 AWD T6 2.9l