Re: Slamming car doors? (gglockner)

Doors are meant to be closed with your hand on the door. Slamming doors in homes loosens hinges and joints and cracks paint. Caveat: Pick your battles and let it go. Don't even wince. Reference: I am sure the Car (and marriage) Talk brothers would agree. Put the miles on your wife and forget about the car.

 

Re: Slamming car doors? (gglockner)

Quote, originally posted by gglockner »

My better half has taken the habit of slamming the doors shut on our V70. I'm worried that this will do damage over time. At first, I thought that she was oblivious to this habit, so I gently reminded her. This morning, she yelled back at me that she's always slammed car doors shut and it wouldn't be a problem. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Extra credit for references to respected auto or marriage counselors!

I feel your pain as I suffer with the same problem...

Keep talking to her and, hopefully, she will get it. My wife has reduced her slamming

to a minimum, my goal is to make that 0%!

I don't know about paint cracking but slamming the doors are not good and the first victims are the door panels, audio speakers and more loose glove box lids.

Yannis

 

Re: Slamming car doors? (sondagsakare)

Quote, originally posted by sondagsakare »

Put the miles on your wife and forget about the car.

Okay. That one got me chuckling.

 

Re: Slamming car doors? (gglockner)

Quote, originally posted by gglockner »

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Extra credit for references to respected auto or marriage counselors!

This is what you need to do:

With a very confident tone, (absolutely do not be cocky), let her know you've given it enough thought to realize there is actually another problem bothering her. Ask if you can help. Do not offer to change yourself. You need to do this subtly, and patiently.
Over the next few days as you continue to "wonder" what's "really" bothering her, continue to ask if there's something she needs to express. React to the door slamming without concern for the car. Demonstrate she is the focus of your thoughts. When she slams the car door the next time, you again question if she's doing alright. Don't do it angrily. Don't do it immediately. Don't mention the car.

You just need to make sure that she realizes your questions/concerns about her well being are the result of her slamming the door. Don't just come out and say, "Hey...you slammed the door. What's wrong?" You can only bring the cause and effect (i.e. her "other" problem is the cause, slamming the door is the effect) together by voicing your "concerns" at the appropriate time.

Best case you accomplish two things -

You assure her that she is your number one, not the car. Don't mention the car.

and

Consciously or subconsciously, she will discontinue slamming the door either because she's sick and tired of your "unwarranted" concern(s) and/or she wants to convey that everything is okay, or because she now feels reassured that she comes first and not the car.

Modified by Chronic at 10:39 AM 1-30-2004

 

Re: Slamming car doors? (sondagsakare)

Quote, originally posted by sondagsakare »

Put the miles on your wife and forget about the car.

I think this is probably the best advice of all. She did this for years on her last car, and I'm afraid this isn't a battle worth fighting. It's a great car, but in the end it's just a car.

 

Re: Slamming car doors? (gglockner)

Let it go, mon. My wife leaves the passenger seatbelt twisted, slams the door, etc. Who cars.

enjoy your car, don't obsess over it

.

Harry

 

Re: Slamming car doors? (Chronic)

Quote, originally posted by Chronic »

This is what you need to do: You assure her that she is your number one, not the car. Don't mention the car...she now feels reassured that she comes first and not the car. Modified by Chronic at 10:39 AM 1-30-2004

Man, I thought it was just my wife.

I think it all goes back to what our wives had to ride in prior to the VOLVO. I finally had to demonstrate that the VOLVO shuts tighter than anything out there by pulling it with two fingers. She was amazed, upon seeing the result...

She'd almost pull the door in with her at first...

 

Re: Slamming car doors? (Griff_33)

Came across this old thread and started to laugh… I have had this problem for years with my family (wife & two kids). After we bought our '02 V70XC (and many conversations about slamming the doors), I finally got them all trained. My wife is actually on the same page as I with this one. We both had to work on the kids together.

Well I just bought an XC90 and the doors on that thing are actually hard to slam (which I like). I now have the OPPOSITE problem… They don't close the doors hard enough and sometimes it takes them 3 times to close them. So now I'm not worried about the panels, speakers, paint, etc… but am worried about the door handles wearing out…

There is always something isn't there?

 

Re: Slamming car doors? (VolvoStew)

Blow the b***h off and get a dog or two. http://********************/smile/emthup.gif