Have you checked out JRL's car? He has red with graphite pegs. Much better looking than with the brights. But that is of course my opinion.
I feel the graphites look better in person! As does the sonic blue. AS DOES THE R!
Although, Quick brick and I will be the only ones with sonic and graphites. Don't know if we need more competition.
Also, I do not find the red to be THAT rare. Kundert Volvo on the Terrace has 9 R's in stock in which 3 or 4 are red! Plus, my dealership has a red with Gobi and sport package. Gobi looks great with red. Sonic blue does too I feel...but not as good as with Nordcap.
It's really hard to display through pictures. But, what I feel the difference is is that the bright's give the sonic blue R a bit more of a sporty/flash factor. The graphites are a bit more aggressive/attention grabbing/business-like in appearance.
My bet, and my gamble, was to get the graphites. They would probably be easier for you to find someone who would be willing to trade their brights for your graphs than vice-versa. The graphs are more limited. Most dealerships will not even stock them without special order, I have found.